Two Personalities in One Body

Part of her believes that she’s made to love and be loved. She is full of scars in her soul that could only be mended by someone who cared enough to warm her frozen heart on their hands in these cold days. She wakes up with messy hair. She just wears jeans and a t-shirt. She burps too loud and she eats a lot. She has a crazy mood, like, one second she wants to be with you but in the next few seconds, she doesn’t want to see you anymore. Yet despite all these, she believes that someone is meant for her and that someone would accept every flaw that she’s been trying to hide in the world.

 

But the other part of her is sure that she isn’t meant to be in a relationship. She is full of insecurities that she feels less confident with her body. People tell her that she looks great and she smiles upon hearing the compliment, but at night when she’s lying alone on her bed thinking about that one guy who never even cared made her realize how ugly she is. She’s pretentious that she makes other people believe that she’s okay even if something is slowly killing her inside. She likes to be alone yet she doesn’t feel lonely at all. She has good books and hot tea mugs that she uses to cover the absence of someone who is not there to hold her heart. She even fools loneliness that she thought she’s fine just by herself. She doesn’t know how to deal with someone on an emotional level and like this, she knows no one can hurt her.

 

Broken and fixed. Warm and cold. Complex and divided in two completely opposite personalities who always fight to deal with each other.